August 2005 - Posts
What a day. First off, I did my presentation for my philosophy class. Eek, I think I spoke reasonably well but I don't think I did so good in actually having a meaty paper to deliver to the other philosophy and religion majors present in the class. I think I skimmed through mine quicker than anyone else. But, after that was the question session where students asked questions about your views. I think I fended them off pretty well. I remembered one guy asked me if he said a horse was on the first floor of the building was it really there just because he said it was and I said yes. I gave an example of if I look at an apple and say it's red, but if he were color-blind and said it was green that we would both be correct even though our perceptions differed.
One of the main themes in my paper is that we can pretty much believe whatever we want and it's our choice to. I did end up getting into an argument with another student though, that was cool, heh. He and my professor were kind of grilling me on various scenarios to see how far I would take my belief and the student brought up one where would he be allowed to open a vial of deadly bacteria in a room full of people. My stance was unchanged, he would be allowed to do it, he would have the right to do it. I told him that just because he has the right to open it doesn't mean I have to just sit there and let him: I can leave, convince other people to leave to, or try and stop him. He seized on the point of me being allowed to stop him as me taking away his right to open the vial of bacteria. He pretty much stumped me there but I think the rest of the class told him it was semantics and he calmed down.
Later on I was thinking about this dilemma and found a solution. First I have to define what is a right. As I'm using it, a right is something that is allowed. So if I say you have a right to hit me in the shin, you are allowed to hit me in the shin. So, on to my solution. A right is just that, an allowance, nothing more. If a person was in a wheelchair and wanted to get from the first floor to the third, but the elevator was broken and no one was willing to carry him up two flights of stairs then the person would have no means of getting to the third floor. He/she would still have the right to get to the third floor, they would be allowed, but there would just be no means of getting to the third floor, no means to exercise the right. So you can have the right to do something while simultaneously not having the ability to exercise that right. So the student in the vial of bacteria example has the right to open the vial in class and kill us all, but I also have the right to try and stop him. If I succeed in stopping him all I would be doing is limiting his/her ability to open the vial, not removing his right to open it; he/she would still be allowed to open the vial but just would have no means of doing so.
Anyway, even though I may have tanked in the eyes of the class I'm glad I at least volunteered. I feel happy about that the most actually, since I volunteered to do something that was nerve-wracking for me.
Chrono Cross - Garden of God [full]
The butterfly has finally been born, the transformation is complete. Yes, as of early Monday morning the butterfly was born. I had just walked out of the door on my way to work in the morning when I saw the butterfly pulling itself away from its chrysalis. It was pretty neat, being able to see a birth in a way. I saw it unfurling its "tongue" that it uses to drink. I saw it flap its wings for the first few times. I knew when I got home it would be gone, but at least I could savor the moment for what it was, something special.
Note, if you've never clicked on the play buttons at the start of some of my posts you should do so now, I really like the music I chose to accompany this post.
I was thinking some more on the butterfly chrysalis hanging on my door and the symbolism of it. I was looking up more on the life cycle of butterflies and noticed how exceedingly odd it is that a caterpillar would choose my non-camouflaged door to transform into a butterfly. It's not quite in the open as it could be but it is not hidden very much either. So what does it symbolize then that a caterpillar chooses my door to transform, I wonder... I felt something of a transformative nature yesterday, just that something is awakening in me that's been asleep for a while, something's changing. I feel like I'm coming out my self-imposed reclusion.
This is a perspective view of the chrysalis on my door. You can see it's actually on the door frame and not the door itself.
This is a close-up of it:
Had my first day of philosophy class. Wow, what kind of people major in philosophy and religion :P. I get in and sit down and am kind of struck by the lack of shoes by a good many of the people around me. Everyone is wearing sandals and has chafed feet! I know I run barefoot now -- good for you -- but these people walk barefoot everywhere it seems. Haha, just a humorous observation.
This is my first "real" college class in a while, since I graduated actually. I'm just saying real in the sense of having to think a bit more than the classes I've been taking as well as the need to present papers in front of the class and be prepared to take comments from the class! Oh boy, did I sign up for this! Heh, I guess so :). I keep telling myself that I'm not really a student so I draw on that knowledge for comfort and security, my college blankie :P.
Azn Rap - Rice Rice Baby [full]
I walked outside as I was going to work and spied a caterpillar on the side of my door, I don't think I can recall ever seeing one of these so late in the summer so I looked a bit closer. It was still so I thought it was dead, but upon closer inspection I realized it was attached to my door, it was actually going into its chrysalis stage! This is cool, so long as nothing messes with it I'll be able to watch it go from a caterpillar into a butterfly as I go to and fro from work.
I made the owner of the farmer's market I go to a CD of my mix since he loves dance music. Surprise, surprise, he gives me free groceries today! Who would've thunk a free CD would net me free produce. Oh well, I'm not complaining!
Tomorrow I begin my first day of classes. I'm finishing up Spanish and taking Philosophy of Religion as well. I haven't been in a "real" class in a while, real meaning a 300-level class. I'm a bit nervous and excited. I mean I've already graduated college once and taken classes harder than this one will be, but still, after being out of the academic loop for 6 years I feel rusty :P. Hopefully I won't have to write any 6-page midterms for my Spanish class like last time. I swear I've never heard of people having to write 6-page papers in a Spanish 101 class before, freakin' insane! Cómo se dice, "fucked up"...
Have you ever thought about why you think the things you do? Surely there's a potential for a loop of thinking in thinking on a topic as this. But specifically, the random thoughts that sway into your mind; there all of a sudden but for no apparent reason.
A few days ago I had a thought come into my mind about Squall Leonhart from the game Final Fantasy VIII. I haven't played this game in a long time, at least 5 years, so it hasn't been on my mind for some time but yet I had a sudden fascination with the character. The obvious connection seemed to center around him being loner, a bit like me. The timing was interesting too, a bit of foreshadowing for later events.
Another thought as I'm writing this. Sometimes I think I'm collecting information in this lifetime to be used in another. There is a reason for the various proclivities we exhibit I've discerned.
2 minute preview Download the full mix
That's the title for my first mix! Yay, I've actually done it. It's probably not quite Global Underground quality but I'm pleased with it. The style is mostly progressive house, although the last song is probably a departure from that. Below is the tracklist and leave comments!
- Van Bellen & Greed - City Lights
- JF Sebastian ft Kaz - Heaven is Here
- Yellow Blackboard - Superfly (Andy Moor Mix)
- Yellow Blackboard - Superfly (Original Mix)
- Ridgewalkers feat. El - Find (Markus Schulz Intro Edit)
- Starkid - Crayons (Leama & Moor's in Loving Memory of Starkid Mix)
- Markus Schulz pres. Elevation - Somewhere (Clear Blue)
- Michael Burns Presents Blue Haze - Into Nothing (Bill Hamel's Last Time in 9 Instrumental)
- DJ Fox Presents Tribal from Lisbon - I Believe (Mastik Soul Remix)
- Shiny Grey - Why (Bob's Le Dream Mix)
Okay, that was lame :P. I have not forgotten about this blog, I've just been busy. If it weren't 2 in the morning I would be recording the final version of my DJ mix :D. Yes, after many many weeks of dreaming and saying I'm going to do this, I'm actually going to do this; this week. Probably tomorrow I'll finish it, and barring I don't screw it up I'll have it available for download by Wednesday, maybe Wednesday morning. I am so excited about this, you just don't know!! Okay, well maybe you do, but still, I'm excited!! :D :D. My first mix. Yay.
This is probably one of the neater, and stranger, experiences I've felt throughout my life. Yesterday I was doing the meditation Kris gave me and so I closed my eyes and started focusing on the mental image I'm trying to conjure up. Not too long after doing this I felt a nudge of sorts, almost like I was guided in a sense, to start focusing from my third eye rather than the generally vague focusing I had been employing. Maybe a few seconds after shifting my focus to my third eye I started feeling myself rotating. My actual physical body was still and relatively motionless but I still felt a feeling like I was rotating freely. It seemed the more I focused from my third eye the more encompassing the rotating felt, like I probably got to rotating 180 degrees before beginning to rotate the other direction. I was actually able to maintain this state for some time and felt I was in control of it, like I could end or start it anytime I wanted.
I used to feel this rotating feeling a lot as a child, primarily when I was going to bed. As I've grown older I've felt this less and less, this is the second time I've experienced this while not going to bed; consciously inducing it. This is interesting, I wonder what's going on with my energy bodies and my awareness when this happens. This is something I'll definitely have to explore with more. I wonder if what Kris said about me having clairvoyant abilities is related to this.
If anyone has any insights into this feel free to share :)